Diary
Today, a USB memory stick arrived at my house. I set it up as a recovery drive. If necessary, I will use it to recover my laptop in case it stops working. Now, my laptop is ready to use.
By the way, the battery issue was resolved last time by replacing the battery. I’m quite pleased that I was able to fix my laptop myself.
Original statements
Today a usb memory arrived at my home. And I set up a recovery drive on the usb memory. To use it, I will recover my laptop if it doesn’t work. Then my laptop is ready to be used. By the way, my laptop’s battery problem was fixed with replacing its battery last time. I feel good enough about that I could fix my laptop by myself.
Explanation of Changes
1. “usb memory” → “USB memory stick”
In British English, “USB memory stick” or simply “USB stick” is more commonly used than “USB memory”.
2. “arrived at my home” → “arrived at my house”
While “home” is acceptable, “house” is more natural when talking about physical delivery.
“Home” refers more to the concept of where you live, whereas “house” can refer to the physical building.
3. “And I set up a recovery drive on the usb memory.” → “I set it up as a recovery drive.”
Avoid starting sentences with “And” in formal or neutral English.
Also, “set it up as a recovery drive” is more natural than saying “on the USB”.
4. “To use it, I will recover my laptop if it doesn’t work.” → “If necessary, I will use it to recover my laptop in case it stops working.”
This version is smoother and clearer. “If it doesn’t work” becomes “in case it stops working” for better clarity and grammar.
5. “Then my laptop is ready to be used.” → “Now, my laptop is ready to use.”
“Now” fits better in context. “Ready to use” is more concise and natural than “ready to be used”.
6. “my laptop’s battery problem was fixed with replacing its battery last time.” → “the battery issue was resolved last time by replacing the battery.”
“Issue” is more natural than “problem” in this context, and “was resolved by replacing” is a clearer, more formal construction than “was fixed with replacing”.
7. “I feel good enough about that I could fix my laptop by myself.” → “I’m quite pleased that I was able to fix my laptop myself.”
“Feel good enough about that” is awkward and unclear.
“I’m quite pleased” is a standard way to express satisfaction in British English, and “was able to” is more idiomatic than “could” in this context.
